The true meaning of 'friendship'

I've always believed that it's for the best that you keep people at an arms length. This way you don't get hurt too much.

I was asked how big my social circle is and if I was able to post a 'Read More' post, I'd stick it up there. But since I'm rather inept at Tumblr, I'll explain here and link it up, it saves a nervous breakdown for all parties concerned. :)

As some of you will already know, I am an identical twin (The lass with the black hair who I hang about with all the time if you've seen photos), her name is Natalie, but everyone calls her Natwee. Apart from a certain few and they know who they are, Nat's probably the greatest friend I could have. She and a certain few have been the least judgemental, the most kind and sincere and the most honest people I know.

But this isn't what I am talking about, I'm going off on one again. I do apologise.

I've never had a good track record with people who I thought were my friends, such examples include a girl who blamed me for her failure at college and another person who hurt me by lying to other people about who I am. I ran away from 1 person and the other I had hurt myself badly because I felt horrible and like a monster, because she convinced friends, staff and many people that I was some sort of horrible psycho. I still harbour feelings like this today. I feel that I will never be good enough, that I'm wrong, that I'm never going to be the normal person that people wish me to be, that I'm just plain ugly inside. Apparently those around you can influence how you act and how you feel, and these people made me feel horrible on the inside. It showed on the outside too, I didn't wash up, I got bruised up and just ended up in a bad shape.

I don't think I ever did recover properly from those incidents. I still have a stupid amount of hang ups and my self esteem is pretty much shot to shit. I can't tell people how I feel, in case I get hurt or if I end up making more enemies than friends.

I know this isn't the most cheerful reply to an ask drop. But sometimes it's a good idea to explain things.

The Art of Osamu Tezuka: God of Manga review (Originally on Galactic Empire Network-November 2009)

"The Art of Osamu Tezuka- God of Manga" by Helen McCarthy- Reviewed by Donna L McGarry

Robots, monsters, surgeons with the hands of gods, myths, legends and a whole host of beautifully crafted shoujo manga along for the ride? Yes, I'm talking about the legendary Osamu Tezuka- godfather of manga. Don't know who that is? Shame on you. Read on, and grab yourself some great manga, anime and a little bit of pop culture history with this amaaaaaazing book!!!1apple.

I recently managed to get my hands on a copy of the upcoming book charting the art and life of Osamu Tezuka- the "god of manga". The book is titled "The Art of Osamu Tezuka- God of Manga" and has been eagerly awaited by fans of the great man himself.

For those who don't know, Tezuka is widely considered to be the godfather of manga and the originator of most modern manga and anime styles and genres. His most well known works include Astro Boy, Blackjack and Kimba the White Lion (arguably the source of Disney's The Lion King).

The book not only covers the amazing works of this extraordinary surgeon-turned-cartoonist but it also delves into his life, history and influences- with some suprises and laughs along the way.

One of the most distinctive and iconic characteristics of his style are the 'big-eyes', which in turn was influenced by Max Fleischer, creator of Betty Boop and Walt Disney. His style covers many genres, from romance to sci-fi and his many sweeping epics. He was also greatly influenced by his love of the world and nature wishing that people would look after it.He realised that he could use the manga medium to help convince people to care for our world.

The book goes on to discuss his earliest influences in the form of mothers stories, and their visits to the Takarazuka Theatre (Which would have a big impact on his later works, one of these being Princess Knight).

Tezuka was the eldest of three, born on 3rd November 1928. He started drawing comics in school, around his second year in elementary. He created his first works at age 17, Diary of Ma-Chan and New Treasure Island (Shin Takarajima). When Tezuka was younger, his arms swelled up and he became very ill. After being treated by a doctor, he was inspired to study medicine at university, he also began his manga career at this point in time. He decided to work on manga full time after he graduated from university with a medical degree.

One of the numerous things Tezuka was well known for was the use of his characters. This is known as the 'Star System' which is pretty much the recurring cast that was used in all of his works. This has also influenced other manga creators, such as CLAMP.

Whilst reading this spectacular collection and history we are presented with many examples of Tezuka's artwork including early work from his childhood. I was suprised and impressed by the amount of detail, humour and general understanding of the comic medium that show through in work at such a young age as 8 or 9 years old.

It really is an in depth look at everything a fan or comic scholar could ever wish to know about this great man. Naturally for a man who produced 150,000 comic pages in his lifetime the book has a large collection of his work, photographs and much more, however it covers so much more.Rather than focus on his famous works such as Astro boy, McCarthy makes a point to cover his lesser known works in equal detail and with the same passion with such gems as Alabaster (The first Tezuka manga that I ever read).

There is also a foreword by Katsuhiro Otomo, the creator of Akira and director Metropolis, the latter being an adaptation and reinvisioning of part of Tezuka's 'Sci-Fi Trilogy'.

For western fans there will be a special treat included in the book- a DVD documentary on the man himself, never before aired outside of Japan. This truly is a breathtaking look at a man who has influenced so many, who showed a mastery of his craft and the ability to expand his knowledge and boundaries to encompass an eclectic variety of genre's and styles in his lifetime.

Now, what are you waiting for? Grab up those Tezuka manga, refresh on those Tezuka anime- order this book and sit down to enjoy the work of a gifted man who has brought joy to millions over 60 years and influenced generations of artists.

The Art of Osamu Tezuka God of Manga will be launched November 1st 2009 for £25 and I urge you all to go buy it, leaf through it at your local comic shop or loan it from your local library. This is one book that every manga and anime fan and anyone who appreciates the story behind some of the greatest art and influences in popular culture will treasure.

July 2009- A new(ish) start.

Righty ho.

I'm not one to take something that i really enjoyed doing and scrap the damn thing. I've had a very serious think about what to do about TECH-DIFF. It's going to be a lot different, and a bit cleaner....oh and it's not going to be inked...cos that looked kinda shite.
Gone are Mel, Crag, Emo-Man and Doktor Goth.
TECH-DIFF is going to be an auto-bio instead. Because apparently, my life and whatnot is more exciting than making up random scenarios.

I'm going to have to get my arse in gear for drawing again. It'll be a nice change from running backwards and forwards to the hospital. I'm so stuck for what to do..and this month's been a good one for strip inspiration.

I've just got back from London film and Comic Con, and it's also been my first. The verdict?

F***ing EPIC.

I went along with Davy, thinking i wouldn't enjoy it. I sure as hell did! Planning on going again next year. The main reason is that i wanted to get one of my posters signed by one of my favourite voice actors, follow the link, this guy needs no further introductions :)
www.vicsworld.net

Well, I did go to the con, along with poster in tow, pretty darn convinced that I wouldn't get even 5 seconds with this guy. Had a HUUUUGE queue to wait through, and I finally got to talk to him, and to ask him to sign my poster.....

Within 0.5 secs i was in giggly fangirl mode, one step away from becoming a 'squeeing' one. I think Davy pretty much kept me grounded, which i'm sure for everyone concerned is a good thing! :)

Talked to him for a bit, got the poster signed, also got one of his CD's autographed and got a photo taken. He's got a very strong hug-grip!!!!! :D

(The photo is at the top of this blog-post)

What a guy!!!

Anyways, enough of my waffling. i have more stories from LFCC, this was just the start. I'll continue later, as it's 1:00 am!!!